Kitty: Time At Lambeth
by LadyElla2199
Summary: Writing as Catherine Howard, this is her few months at Lambeth Palace prior to her leaving for Court to be a Lady In Waiting to Anne of Cleves.
1. Chapter 1

Lambeth, July 1539

Birthdays come and go, year after year and are of no consequence. But I think otherwise. Today is the day I will have seen 14 summers…14...imagine that !

I belong to one of the most important noble families in England. That would mean I am rich, but alas I am not. But riches do not matter when you are in love. What do I know about love? I hear you say, well, I will tell you.

Francis Dereham is his name and I have known him for what seems an eternity and I am devoted to him. There isn't a single moment in the day I do not think about him. Tonight, when Norfolk House is all quiet, he will come to visit me in the chambers I share with the other girls. They dismiss me as a little girl, but I am anything but that. I am ready for a lover, and I am so in love with Francis Dereham that I think I would die if I do not see him very soon. But from this day on, I know everything will be different. Now, I call myself a woman grown; for that is what I am at the age of 14.

However, the spectre of Henry Mannox still lurks in the background. He was my first love, but the feelings I have for Francis are totally different from those I had for the Scotsman who was employed by my Grandmother. That first time he kissed me, I liked it not and shrieked at him to leave me alone when his hand wandered under my gown. I was but 11 years old, a child really. Now, I know what goes on between men and women, my 3 years sharing chambers with the likes of Joan Bulmer, have taught me every trick a woman can use to get her own way and enjoy the pleasures it can lead to.

"Your reputation is important, as is your name," my Grandmother tells me, "When the time comes it will put you in good stead to make a good marriage."

It is repetitive and quite frankly the old woman bores me with her lectures. She thinks that I do not pay attention and know what is expected of me; but I do know.

Let it not be said that Catherine Howard does not know what she wants out of life.

I am a woman now and not a child. Henry Mannox wanted me when I was but a child who had seen nothing and knew nothing. Had I given in to his bullying, he would have done the deed; but it was him who would not go through with it, for a great fear of being caught beset him and he left me alone.

Whatever God has in store for me, it will be for a reason, for he wouldn't have made me so desirable to men. So, here I am 14 and in my own eyes perfect. Surely I will not waste away in the abyss that is Lambeth Palace?


	2. Chapter 2

Lambeth, November 1539

"Wife…."

"Husband…."

In the darkness I cannot see his face, but I can feel the curve of his lips against mine once again,

"Did you put your ring on a chain so it can be hidden from sight?"

"Yes, it will be forever close to my heart."

"And you will belong to me for ever."

In the sleepy after effects of lovemaking, the sheets are tangled about our limbs. His scent is all over me. Francis Dereham is finally mine as I knew he would be.

"For the love of God, will you two please be quiet and let the rest of us get some sleep," comes a shout from across the chamber I share with the other girls, "We don't want to hear your moans and groans all night."

I giggled, someone was jealous of me and my love, Francis.

We wait for a little while and continue our talk.

"Kitty," Francis uses his nickname for me, "You do know that if we make promises before God and exchange tokens; like the ring I have given you tonight, it will be as if we have been to church and wed before people?" he asks earnestly.

I half open my eyes, shift a little upon my bed as his hand caresses my stomach. A sigh escapes my lips as I instinctively open my legs to invite his body to entwine with mine once more.

"Yes," I say.

"So, shall we marry in secret and always be together?"

"Yes, yes," I start to moan a little from the pleasure I am getting from his fingers upon sensitive parts of my body. Then there is no more talk as he brings me to release as he replaces his fingers with his strong body.

Morning comes and Francis is hard pressed not to be discovered. For if he were caught it would go bad for him and for me. My Grandmother has a fondness for the birch and is very effective in dishing out punishment, whether you deserve it or not.

Later, when I think no-one would miss me, I slip into the chapel where we usually hear morning mass. There waiting for me with a wide smile on his face is Francis.

He holds his hand out for me. It is a wonderful moment.

"Catherine, will you marry me?" Francis asks.

At this moment I feel so grown up. No-one in my family has bothered to think about a marriage for me; I am of little consequence as I am a girl with little or no money despite my noble name.

"Yes," I say, "I will."

He gently pulls me down the aisle in the chapel, towards the altar. I stop for a moment, hesitant, but as he reaches out and touches my cheek in a show of tenderness, all thoughts of doubt disappear. I only wish that I had worn a better gown than the hand me down I am currently in.

"I, Francis Dereham, do take thee, Catherine Howard, to be my lawful wedded wife," he says with firmness.

I look up into his face and smile, "I Catherine Howard, do take thee Francis Dereham, to be my lawful wedded husband," I reply.

Francis leans down and kisses me. I go giddy at his touch, I wish the kiss would last forever.

"Now we are married." he confirms.

I giggled, "You jest Francis, I am only fourteen."

His face becomes solemn, "It makes no difference, you and I have promised ourselves to each other in front of God in this holy place."

Reaching into his pocket he pulls out a brown pouch, "As my wife, you will be keeper of our fortune."

"But why?"

"You know I leave for Ireland. Once there I will make enough money to come home and ask openly for you as my wife."

The weight of the pouch is heavy and it dawns on me that he has already saved a lot of money for our future together.

"Oh, when you return I shall wear a new gown when we tell everyone."

Francis pulls me into his arms, laughs huskily while nuzzling my neck, "I shall buy you as many gowns as you want Mrs Dereham."


	3. Chapter 3

Lambeth, December 1539

Christmas draws near and excitement grips me; I wonder what I will be given. Already, I know what my gift from my Grandmother is, she is to give me a bolt of cloth to make a gown, but this gown is to be for Sundays and feast days, so I can not have it with fancy embroidery. My beloved Francis has gifted to me a shift of the softest material. It is glorious against my skin and in the shadows of night, I show Francis that I wear his gift all the time. I have thought for days and days as to what I should give him; in the end I have given him a belt; it is no ordinary belt, for I have carefully woven strands of my favourite colours into it and I know he will love it. With regret it will be our last Christmas together, as Francis is determined come the new year to set sail for Ireland to make his fortune and then return to these shores and openly ask for my hand in marriage.

The King and his Court have returned to Greenwich Palace for Christmas; I had hoped that they would have graced the nearby palace of Whitehall so I might have had the chance to see all the grand Lords and their Ladies; maybe even see The King at his meal. I know my Uncle, The Duke of Norfolk is there, but he does not send for me or any of my cousins, though my Grandmother went to dine once or twice. There are times when I think nothing will ever happen to me and I will remain in this house for the rest of my days and die a lonely woman. I will be fifteen soon, yet, no-one has clearly thought as to what my future will be. If it were not for my noble name, I would be a nobody.

Our celebrations here at Lambeth are decidedly less extravagant than those I imagine take place at Court. There is to be dancing of course, and how I love to dance; But, what is the point in dancing here, when all in attendance have seen you dance every day of every week for the last year?

My Grandmother watches me as an eagle does its pray, she calls out to me, and I being the ever dutiful granddaughter stand before her.

"I hear rumours about you and Master Dereham. I thought I had already warned you already about your behaviour."

"I do not know what you mean Grandmother," I say cleverly.

She is not sure whether to believe me or not and reaches out and raps my knuckles with the fan she holds.

"You are a Howard, never forget that," she says with her eyes narrowed, "When your Uncle calls for you to go to Court to wait on the new Queen, you will not want to refuse it because of some flirtation that has gotten out of hand."

"I am to go to Court?" I ask wide eyed.

"Maybe," she says teasingly, "There are always places for the girls of noble families."

I press her for more details, "When am I to go?"

"I have not said you are definitely going."

"Oh Grandmother, please…." I beg.

She waves me away and I escape from her presence. There is a knot of excitement building in my stomach. Would she be so cruel to dangle such a thing in front of me?

I hope not, all I can do is wait and see if it comes true.

That same night when Francis came to the chamber I shared, I met him at the door. "I cannot let you in, " I tell him bluntly, "My Grandmother suspects something, I do not know who has planted the seeds of suspicion, but she has warned me about my behaviour and how I cannot go to Court if any hint of scandal is attached to me."

There is a frown on his face, "But Kitty…."

"We cannot risk it," I insist, "She will find out….You know she will…."

"But we cannot deny how we feel about each other," he replies.

"No," I shake my head.

"Even if we were to be found out, you must tell her we were married in the eyes of God."

"Yes, but…."

"Then let me in as your husband, sweet Kitty."

"No….You cannot." I had to be firm. I wanted to go to Court and attend on the new Queen, If I had to choose between the two, then I am afraid I would have to wave goodbye to my love.

Francis tries to get me to change my mind by wrapping me in his arms and nibbling on the crook of my neck, "I leave for Ireland soon," he whispers against my ear, "Will you send me away with a broken heart?"

"Francis, I do not want your heart to break, but, I must do this."

He knows all about the possibility of me going to Court, "You think that once at Court, you will become a fine lady and flirt with the likes of your noble cousins or anyone who will turn your pretty head? Remember you are my WIFE."

I fix Francis with a look that I had so many times seen my Grandmother give when she was ire, "I cannot discuss my plans with you."

"Kitty," he cries pathetically, "You are my wife, you are my intended, my beloved."

"I must ask you to leave," I say firmly, then I close the door in his face.

All at Lambeth Palace are in a frenzy of anticipation for my Uncle, The Duke of Norfolk is coming to see my Grandmother. I have to make myself presentable in case he sends for me.

"He is here," Mary Lascalles comes to tell me, "You are to go down immediately. They are waiting for you."

Entering the parlour, and there he is, standing before the fire; my father's brother.

I sink into the curtsey that I had practised over and over again. Slowly I look up at his face before I rise, "My Lord Uncle," he gestures for me to get up, "I wish you a good day, Sir."

"She is pleasing to the eye and her manners are a credit to you Madam."

"Catherine is a Howard girl through and through," says my Grandmother, she has no high opinion of us Howard girls for we are known for our beauty and forwardness.

"I was expecting a child," My Uncle says as if he is pleased to find me grown up.

"She is a very knowing child," She gives me a look in warning to remind me that people would be scandalised if they found out what I have learned whilst in her care.

"Yes, she will do," he says after a while, "Tell me Katherine, can you dance, sing and play the lute?"

"Yes, Your Grace."

"Read, write in English and French?"

I frown a little and open my mouth to answer, but my Grandmother answers for me.

"Why on earth would she need that?" she asks, "For the Queen speaks nothing but German."

He nods, "That is true. But His Majesty also likes an educated woman."

"That was true once. Now, he likes a compliant wife."

"So much like yourself Your Grace."

My uncle snorts, everyone knows how much he and his wife hate each other; their arguments often made the rounds in gossip.

"What matters is that she pleases the Queen. Catherine, you are to go to Court and be one of the Queen's ladies in waiting."

I cannot keep the wide smile off my face.

"You are happy at this news?"

"Yes, Your Grace. I am very grateful that you have chosen me to go."

"You will be placed in a position that means you will be a credit to your family. You know how to behave and make sure no taint of scandal attaches itself to your name."

My eyes look down, for I cannot look at my Grandmother. She knows all too well what I am capable of. She knows about Henry Mannox and she is sure that I am free with my favours to Francis Dereham. I would have to make sure that I will be a chaste maid while at Court.

"Nothing is more important than your reputation. Your status must be unblemished; any gossip about you will result in your being removed from Court."

"I understand Your Grace," It comes out in a whisper, "I promise."

With a wave of his hand I am dismissed; I sink into another curtsey, my head bowed before I withdraw,

Once free of their presence, I run for the stairs and for the chamber I share with the others.

"I am going to Court, "I shout at them, "And I am to have new gowns and jewels. I will be the prettiest girl there and I will never see any of you again."


End file.
